Life.
My life sucks, seriously. That explains why i havent blog for more than a week.
Cos thr's nth to blog about everyday.
Unless, you want me to blog the same damn thing over and over again everyday.
Which, i won't.
Thinking about it.
I ask myself every morning when i wake up, 'Today is a new day. Hmm.. do i have anything to look forward to today?"
Majority of the answers are, 'Nope, it's going be another boring and dreadful day."
Maybe it bcos of the arrival of N lvls..?
But it doesn't seem like the answer.
Thinking about it.
Like what i've said, i like to dig up my past alot. Or rather, i like to recall my past.
Thinking back, i realised, the things i've said, i've done are just simply, stupid.
Simple word it may be, but stupid explains it all. Or maybe, meaningless.
I had a period of sadness, or some may call it emo-days, with hy.
Things weren't going well for us bfore.
I recalled, the things i've done to her, the thing's i said to her, the way i treated her.
Oh well, not totally stupid, but somehow somewhat.
When i recall the stupid things i've done, i really feel like stabbing myself wif a dagger.
I carved a star on my arm and eventually got found out by my sis.
And she was like, 'are u in a cult or something?'
And she was going to send me for counselling.
Thinking about it now, yea, it's not the right way to express my feelings.
I used to tell myself, 'The pain will only be thr for a short period of time, just tahan. The aftermath will be beautiful.'
That
was how i expressed my feelings. Stupid, foolish, silly you may call me.
But i don't really do it now.
I'm not trying to think like a 20 or 30 odd adult.
But, it makes sense doesn't it.
I hardly cry in reality which explains why i cry in my dreams.
I learnt the hard fact of blogging.
I, we, blog bcos we want pple to know how our life is like.
That's the thing.
If you're those who's like complaining, 'don't like den don't read my blog laa. it's my blog, i write how i feel, you don't have to care'.
You might as well create a private/personal blog rather than a public blog.
Tht is what i'm going to do sooner or later. To create a private blog.
I envy those who have things/events to look forward to everyday.
They can blog about what happened every min.
Like, adelene. She blogs about what happened every lesson.
Like, finaaa. She have events to look forward to every weekend. She has a very very wide circle of frens.
Friends, i don't rank my friends.
But, i have very few close ones. Close ones meant the ones who spend most of his/her time wif me/you.
In fact, i only have one or two or three. That's all.
Losing one might be like a meat cut off from me.
But being a blog-hopper. I'm curious how pple's life is like.
So, it's the same thing.
I blog for other's curiousity.
Or, i blog what i wanna say.
K, idk if what i've said actually make sense.
Sometimes, when i'm like mabok, i anyhow blog.
What comes to my mind, will be written/typed here.
I guess life only has one thing for me to look forward to now.
Studies loh.
I'm all drained with mock pprs everyday.
It has been like this for a few months.
And for the next few months, i'll be drowned. Tht is what N lvls is all about.
Like tht also cannot tahan, how you gonna survive in O lvls? I told myself. Or i might not even be able to smell the pprs of O lvls.
Tell me tell me now, does my life sucks?
Ha ha ha.
Only some days are worth looking forward to.
Like, ystd.
Spent my after school with jm, pritpal, hy and jasper.
Watched Pirates of the Carribean: Dead Man's Chest.
It was awesome. Mostly humor.
Captain Jack Sparrow aye!?
Some other thoughts are better left unsaid.
Yes, i'm being a
bitch i noe.
I know.
Death Cab For Cutie is a good band.
